Recently, we were able to spend a little time with some young friends of ours, Thomas and Beth. They are parents of three young children ages seven, three, and one. You can tell that they are doing a good job as parents. We met in a public restaurant and even though the kids tagged along, we were able to have a substantive conversation. It was fun to be with the whole family.
Beth is a wise little mom who has been home-schooling Caleb, the oldest. As they look at the fall, they are thinking of enrolling him in a day school program. In talking about the change in venue for his education, she made this very true statement: “but I will always be teaching.”
And she is right. Parents are always teaching their children.
Since that conversation, I have given some thought to the three main things that we teach our children. Here are my three. I encourage you to comment and add your own thoughts to our discussion.
1. We teach what is important. As our kids watch us invest our time, our energy, and our money, they learn what we think is important. Do this little exercise to get some hints on what you are really teaching your kids. Look at your calendar—where has your time gone? Look at your checkbook—where has your money gone? Make a note of your accomplishments this past month—where has your energy gone? How you answer these three questions will give you a good indicator of what you think is important. That’s what your kids are learning.
2. We teach attitude. They see us react to numerous situations, many that don’t go our way or that don’t go according to our liking. As they watch and listen they are learning attitude. They are learning to trust God or not to. They are learning to gripe or to praise. They are learning a mindset toward life.
3. We teach what we know. A thousand little things that occur each day are taught almost by osmosis. They just catch it. How we dress, how we brush teeth, how we organize, how we laugh, how we speak. Social graces, manners, choices of words, and on and on.
So you see that we are always teaching and our kids are always learning. If you are like us, you will get some of this stuff right, and you will fall short on too many things to mention. So let’s get the most important thing right. 1 Corinthians 3: 20-23 summarizes it this way:
"The Lord knows that the thoughts of the wise are futile." So then, no more boasting about men! All things are yours, whether . . . the world or life or death or the present or the future--all are yours, and you are of Christ, and Christ is of God.
2 comments:
That was a nice read. Not sure if it's fitting...but just this morning, I reflected on something that occurred in our home last night. It was a defining moment. A moment that left me proud. One of those times when you're thankful for the hard work you put into parenting and you stop to praise God for the ways he directed you.
Our son will be 15 years old next month. He had asked Mr. Currie if he could 'say something' at the graduation ceremony coming up in a week or so.
He came into the living room where I was working on a project on the floor. The younger children were tucked in. His dad came in and sat with us. He shared how the meeting with the principal went and told us what he had planned to do.
He didn't know just how to write the speech. He had his Bible there and had read some scriptures that Mr. Currie asked him to include. I asked him, 'what do you want to say?' He shared a bit and then he went on to say that he was going to ask a buddy of his what he thought. I told him that dad and I would be glad to help. And it was what he said next that made me proud: "That's why I'm here."
He knew we were a safe place. He knew we would help. He knew that he could trust us. He knew where to come. I sat on the rug with the urge to tell him what to write. BUT I quietly prayed: Lord, you show him. You help him do it.
After the first sentence he spoke aloud, he then began to pen his speech. I looked up from my project after about five minutes and asked what he had so far. He said, 'hold on, don't speak, I'm on a roll'! Funny how God brings it out.
But when it gets to the heart of the matter, he trusted mama and papa. Because we've trusted God. We bless His name. I pray as God leads us onward, I can keep 'surrendering' my son (and our other two children) to the Lord.
Lord you write their stories. Remind me to step back, and allow you to do in them what I cannot. Thank you Lord that our kids know where to come. And help us remember to direct them to you.
It always amazes me to hear my words coming out of the mouths of my children (both positive and negative). I am equally amazed when I hear the words of my parents coming out of my mouth as well.
This helps me remember that my first goal as a parent is to follow Christ.
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